Sad Girls Por Vida

On hold, line two, still crying

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Stray observations on a brief listen to the radio: 04/01/2009
1. Soulja Boy Tellem's proliferation of American culture has to reach breaking point soon, right?

2. There is an ad on the radio, reminding me that I am listening to the radio. It's really quite oppressive, using selling points for the medium like "It's already in your car," "In public places you can't avoid it," and my personal favorite, "This way, you don't have to bother making decisions." The last one is kind of creepy, like those infomercials where someone is bewildered and possibly mutilated by putting a lid on a jar, only it extends to your personal tastes. No wonder the medium is dying when the best argument it can make for it's continued existence is "Bitch, you can't do anything better than me. I hit you because I have too!"

3. There has to be a better way to sell people on your shitty club's ladies night by inviting "All you ladies of the female persuasion" down to "Wild Woman Wednesdays." What does the first selling point even mean? Do they screen for weapons, drugs, and vaginoplasty at the door?

4. Apparently the best way to sell dollar hot dogs at your shitty gas station is to play a clip of a dyslexic girl attempting to puzzle her way through the alphabet, then point out how juicy your hot dogs are for the remaining seven seconds.

5. Apparently the best way to sell the station's morning Zoo Crew DJ is to have him harass the mailman on the air for being black.

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Let's not forget the radio ad that advised against using a tax return to start a retirement fund, or repair a damaged roof, or pay off credit card debt, instead encouraging you to buy a new car stereo system.

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